


the hole in my foundation is all-consuming

by crookedspoon



Series: short and infrequent [41]
Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: Canon Related, Community: fic_promptly, Community: slashthedrabble, Fire, M/M, POV Edward Nygma, Riddles, Sexual Tension, wordcount: 500
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-05 00:27:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14605149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crookedspoon/pseuds/crookedspoon
Summary: He once waged a war on this man to make him laugh, because what bigger puzzle is there than a joker who can't laugh? He'd intended to solve it. It remains to be solved.Takes place after the War of Jokes and Riddles.





	the hole in my foundation is all-consuming

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompts "Coffee or Tea?" at slashthedrabble and "DCU (Batman or Gotham), Riddler/any, riddles as courtship" at [fic_promptly](https://fic-promptly.dreamwidth.org/319482.html?thread=11428346#cmt11428346).

"I am not alive, but I grow," Edward says as his arms embrace a reedy torso, hidden under layers of cloth. "I don't have lungs, but I need air." Breath so close to a white ear the heat radiating off it warms his skin. "I don't have a mouth, but water kills me." He can all but taste the aroma of ammonia and bleach, of smoke and lipstick. "What am I?"

"Fire," Joker says, unmoving, the blaze across from them dancing yellow and bright in his dispassionate eyes. His gloved hand finds Edward's cheek, gunpowder residue on the fingertips, a titillating touch. Edward leans against it, brushes his fingers against Joker's wrist and rolls up his glove, presses his lips against the inside of his palm. The scar through its middle like the slit of an eye is soft and pink, barely healed. 

He once waged a war on this man to make him laugh, because what bigger puzzle is there than a joker who can't laugh? He'd intended to solve it. It's what he does.

The scar is a reminder. It signifies the ending of a war that began with the scars on Edward's chest. Joker tried to kill him with a bullet, only to save him from a knife. The irony borders on absurdity, something the Joker must appreciate.

Edward prefers to follow things to their logical conclusion; the absurd defies logic. And thus Edward's need for a neat conclusion.

The puzzle remains to be solved.

"A necessity to some, a treasure to many, I'm best enjoyed among pleasant company," he says, again so close he can practically taste Joker. "Some like me hot and some like me cold. Some prefer mild, others only bold." Joker shifts in his grip, eyes leaving their GCPD bonfire to frown at him. "Some take me straight, while some savor my essence to which has been added a flavor." Approaching sirens nearly drown out his words. "So put down your cares and sit awhile with me; I'll send you back refreshed and full of energy."

"Are you inviting me for coffee?" Joker asks, posture rigid, as if the mere idea offended him.

"Unless you'd prefer tea." Edward shrugs. It's not what he had in mind, but he'll take it.

"Is this a joke?" The revolver he cocks glints a warning in the firelight.

"Am I laughing?"

He is not, but his smirk is a close cousin, so he hides it before it is misconstrued. And where better to hide than right under someone's nose? Joker's mouth is hard against his, unyielding but not discouraging, same as the fist in his hair.

To solve this puzzle, Edward will take Joker apart if he must. Shed the layers of cloth to reveal the white skin beneath.

His grip on Joker's ribs tightens and so do the muscles beneath. A spasm. Indeed. Why had he not thought of this before? Not a clever solution, but an avenue to explore: tickle the laughter out of Joker.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Redacted from a Know-Your-Rights Training Agenda" by Cynthia Dewi Oka.
> 
> Rebloggable post [here](https://crookedspoonfic.tumblr.com/post/173793567985/fic-riddles-as-courtship-dcu-t).


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